The Sexual Addictions Internet Clinic aims to help prevent offensive, abusive or compulsive sexual behaviour by collaborating with other professionals or centres that provide treatment programs. By offering expertise and individual treatment strategies that will compliment other interventions and treatment programs, this clinic hopes to promote more effective solutions to a world wide and growing problem. The following discussion serves to establish an empirically sound basis for treatment by dismissing much of the misconception and confusion that has arisen concerning the subject of human sexuality.

Isn’t sexuality genetically determined and therefore fixed for life?

In previous decades sexuality seemed to be quite resistant to change through psychotherapy, although there have been a few controversial claims to the contrary. The results of medical and surgical interventions however have long been far more dramatic, leading many researchers to conclude that there must be immutable genetic determinants. Modern findings indicate that it’s not that simple. The compelling evidence from a large number of medical studies and results of therapeutic programs based on empirical studies indicate very convincingly that the human sex drive is biologically generated or innate like human capacity for language or the appetite for eating. However the research is equally compelling that sexuality is directed or shaped through upbringing, socio-cultural experiences and religious/moral education. It’s similar in some respects to the way language development and food preference occurs. Sexual preference [i.e. the focus of the sexual appetite] is to a large extent learned through experience, like an acquired taste. The parallel with food and language cannot be taken too far. For example, sexual appetite varies much more in potency from person to person than eating appetites, and the particular language learned varies much less in a uniform social environment, being almost entirely determined by the influence of parents, siblings and others in the immediate environment of experience.

On the other hand, sexual preferences vary considerably from person to person depending on early life experiences, especially emotional/relationship issues or conflicts during adolescence and most importantly, often through random or chance experiences. In fact, the range of sexual preferences for many individuals appears to be a lot wider than generally or publicly acknowledged; however sexual behaviour itself is more restrictive, due to the influence of socio-cultural mores and religious rituals, traditions and taboos. Because human sexuality is learned, it can be redirected [even in adulthood] through properly designed and executed cognitive behaviour modification programs.

Why sexual feelings and behaviour were previously difficult to change?

Effective application of cognitive behavioural reconditioning techniques for treatment of offensive and compulsive sexual behaviour requires specialist knowledge and insight into the physiological and mental processes involved in sexuality. These processes are quite complex and the subtleties are not fully appreciated by many professionals and even by some of those providing this kind of treatment. Furthermore, some professionals offering treatment promote only classical conditioning strategies, others only operant conditioning strategies, when in fact both strategies need to be applied [interactively] in most cases for the program to succeed. As a result, many other programs achieve only a lowering of sexual impulsiveness or a broadening of sexual interest as the outcome rather than a complete change in the erotic pattern of sexual arousal and the content of fantasies experienced. The apparently slow progress or even lack of progress achieved by ill-equipped and inexperienced psychologists in this type of therapy has caused many to abandon this kind of therapy in favour of other less definitive types.

It is therefore not surprising that a number of researchers conclude that medication or surgical castration is the most effective treatment for offensive and compulsive sexual behaviour. Those treatments may be quicker, however, the result achieved is again not reconditioning or modification of the erotic pattern of sexual arousal and change in the content of fantasies experienced but only a lowering of sexual activity. That's why an alternative, less drastic but more appropriate strategy is offered by the Sexual Addictions Internet Clinic for those who are motivated to change.

This is NOT to imply that these techniques or strategies are all that's needed for treating offensive and compulsive sexual behaviour but they should be included in nearly all cases for a good long term treatment outcome. The more common therapeutic approaches aim mainly at increasing the client’s insight into his condition or the consequence of his actions. That does little to help the client. Sexual reconditioning strategies are also more therapeutic than those conventional therapeutic approaches that work towards introducing more restraints against re-offending such as shame therapy, persuasive aversion therapy, interactions for trying to increase empathy for the victim, or new strategies for avoiding situations and temptations etc. Those approaches could merely frustrate unconscious but legitimate emotional needs. Part of the motivation for offensive sexual behaviour is an emotional make-up arising out of unfulfilled needs for affection during childhood and adolescence and these play out in the pattern of sexual behaviour in later years. By reconditioning the offender's sexuality and making the person truly safe with children, the offender is then able to have those needs fulfilled [emotionally but not sexually or abusively] in healthy interactions with children. After that they can move on to finding complete fulfilment also in the next level of interpersonal relationships with adults - an area where the offender is often also frustrated. Restraint is certainly helpful at the beginning, before the reconditioning program starts taking effect, but then pre-planned and controlled interaction should be permitted when the client is ready and safe. If that is explained to the client he will be more willing to co-operate with therapy. Therapy that merely produces insight for the offender by bringing unconscious needs to consciousness is of no value if it's left there. Resolution of frustrations will only occur if the offender is allowed to have those unconscious needs fulfilled [emotionally but not sexually or abusively] and then move on.

What is the relationship between offensive sexual behaviour and masturbation?

Research shows that offensive sexual behaviour is generally associated with frequent masturbation while fantasizing. This is not to say that masturbation causes offensive sexual behaviour; it's more complicated. Offensive sexual behaviour and compulsive masturbation are obviously not the same, but there are many common elements. Many cases of compulsive masturbation without offensive sexual behaviour are in fact correctly described as Narcissism - men who are sexually attracted to their own bodies in the true sense and same way that other men are sexually attracted to women. Research shows the relationship to be as follows. Masturbation is the means by which sexual fantasies are created and perpetrated. Sexual fantasies feed and increase sexual desires [particularly when narcissistic tendencies are a contributory influence] and eventually motivate a particular preferred pattern of sexual behaviour, either offensive or not. If narcissistic tendencies play a part in the addiction, then that needs to be addressed in the treatment.

Of course a good conscience and sense of moral restraint in an individual with a low sex drive would prevent someone who masturbates with deviant sexual fantasies from acting them out with a victim. Likewise, an extremely strong moral conscience or fear of reproach is needed to restrain a highly sexed person with offensive desires. Some highly sexed people who are normally well controlled may offend when judgement is impaired by alcohol.

Those who have been in the habit of masturbating would typically have developed conditioned unconscious mental processes similar to sexual fantasies that reinforce the habit [the way obese people become more attuned to food and gratification as their stomachs and bodies get larger from over-eating]. It's only by practising specific exercises and meditations to undo these unconscious associations [rather persistent once formed] that a person can permanently break free from the habit. So, the heart of the matter needs to be changed - the unconscious part of the brain where our emotions and passions are formed. Sheer will power with an unchanged heart will fail when a person is tempted while feeling spiritually low or when his judgement is impaired by alcohol. Some respected business men and wealthy socialites from Western countries would go on business trips or arranged tours to Asia or Africa where they sexually abused children in brothels and then went back to live "clean lives" at home in between the trips. This kind of behaviour happens when people believe they can get away with it without anyone finding out.

It is now accepted that some child sexual offenders will offend without being sexually aroused to children. This recognition has probably changed the emphasis somewhat on treating this aspect of the offenders’ behaviour. However that does not mean the offensive behaviour is NOT sexually motivated. Sexual arousal as in erection may not be active with some child sexual offenders but sexual arousal as in arousal of the autonomic nervous system similar to normal sexual arousal but with only slight or no erection would still be going on in the situation of offensive behaviour. Research suggests it's the release of Adrenaline, Testosterone, Dopamine and Serotonin during autonomic arousal in the situation of offensive behaviour [with or without erection] that motivates and reinforces the behaviour like a substance addiction. These conditioned autonomic reactions need to be extinguished in the treatment program and ideally replaced by a new set of reactions typical of the normal male with a healthy sexuality.

Three co-ordinated stages of change

Some people will need to progress through three co-ordinated stages to permanently and satisfactorily modify their sexuality. In the first stage, a strategy of mental and physical exercises is used to enable the hypothalamic control mechanism to develop a new pattern of sexual responses to the chosen target group and situation. At a certain point, the second stage begins when another strategy comes into effect in parallel with the first. The second strategy is used to extinguish the old, unacceptable patterns of sexual response the autonomic system had previously learned before the program of change commenced. The two strategies together reinforce the new pattern. In the final stage, a strategy of focused meditations is used to enable the body to derive sensual energy [a mild and sustained autonomic response] from situations that were previously experienced as highly sexual but without reproducing any sexual response [the escalating autonomic response with erection and leading to sexual climax]. This stage establishes the new pattern of sexuality as a normal part of life without the help of any extraordinary strategy or planned intervention such as the case in stages one and two.

A book is available to inform and guide diagnostic assessments and plan individual treatment programs. This empirically based work with numerous research references presents a holistic model that explains human sexual development for males from birth to adulthood in terms of five primary factors. The book discusses how the primary factors interact to determine the various sexual preferences and behaviours we observe as well as some of the many deviations from normality. An electronic copy can be purchased for US$10 by emailing the Clinic.

To download a sample pdf please click here