How do these programs work?
Could this work for me?
Is it possible to change sexual feelings?
How long will this take?
What are the benefits?
What will this cost?
How do I pay for a personalized strategy?
What if I start and then give up half way?
Where else can I find help?
What other treatments are available?
What are my responsibilities?
Why sexual feelings are so difficult to change?
What information does the clinic need from me?

How do these programs work?

The strategies offered consist of home-based, self-help exercises that should be carried out for at least 40 minutes and at least 3 times per week to experience any long term benefit. Individual strategies of mental, physical and sexual exercises are compiled on the basis of questionnaire information supplied by candidates. Instead of avoiding experiences that are currently sexually exciting, these programs will require you to systematically engage and deal with them in a controlled manner. Over a period of several months, any sexual imagery or erotic situations that have been the focus of attention during the program will gradually loose their impact as they become less and less erotic. These programs are not particularly onerous. In fact many who follow them will experience a slight sharpening of sensory perception and improved sense of well-being as a result of hormones released into the bloodstream during the program. Furthermore, the previous frustrations of trying to restrain one’s own sexual impulses are minimised and eventually eliminated through these programs.

Initially weekly and later monthly follow up contact may be required to check on progress and provide additional information or advice if required. Success depends on the frequency and regularity with which these exercises are performed. Much like changing any other addictive habits, the more one works at the program the sooner change is experienced, and the longer one sticks to the program the more permanent the change becomes.

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Could this work for me?

Guilty and worried about past sexual offences?

Still engaging in improper activities with children?

Tired of stealing away secretly for your sexual thrills and fantasies?

Finding your sexual appetite controlling you?

Wondering if other people struggle with the same secrets or frustrations you have?

If so, YOU are one of millions of highly sexed people out there in the world and until now you’ve felt it’s just the way you were born. You’re not the only one and like countless others, you may be pretending, “there’s nothing wrong with me,” or “It’s not my fault.” YES, you did not choose the sexual feelings and impulses that motivate your behaviour. BUT from now you can take control and change that. You can choose your new sexuality for the better.

It’s no longer a mystery. In recent decades, modern scientific research has been discovering more and more of the intricate mental and physiological processes of human sexuality – how and why we feel and act the way we do. Now in the 21st century, with the extent of knowledge and experience available, you can change your sexuality, slowly and steadily, by putting into practice a personalised strategy. Rather than trying to justify, deny or repress your sexual desires and impulses, these strategies will engage your sexual feelings through sets of exercises and meditation techniques that change them, allowing you to live a healthy lifestyle without fear of reproach, exposure for offence or criminal conviction. You’ll feel really good about yourself. Why not start right NOW?!!!

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Is it possibly to change sexual feelings?

Obviously, we can’t change our sexual feelings here and now simply by deciding to do so. These feelings are not under our direct voluntary control, although we can decide what to do about them - we can try to avoid giving in to our sexual impulses and stay out of trouble or we can ignore restraint and do whatever we desire. Furthermore, we can indirectly change our sexual feelings over a period of time by choosing to follow a program of exercises designed to change these feelings. There’s no doubt that change is possible and in fact the extent of change can be quite dramatic. The only uncertainty is the matter of whether or not we choose to undergo the process of change!

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How long will this program take?

The longer you have been masturbating while entertaining the unacceptable sexual thoughts and ideas you have decided you want to eliminate, the longer you will need to continue with the program to succeed. For example if you have been masturbating almost every second day for the past 10 years and often used child pornography, it could take up to 5 years practising these exercises daily before you will find the idea of sexual acts with children no longer attract and excite you. That does not mean it takes 5 years to experience any benefit. There are some more immediate benefits.

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What are the benefits?

The first benefit:
As soon as you start the program you will realise that there is less frustration in confronting and dealing directly with your sexuality rather than trying to curb or deny your unacceptable urges and desires. In these programs we don’t deny ourselves the desire to entertain those sexual thoughts and ideas that have previously controlled our behaviour; but we do so in a planned manner and only in situations where we are in control of ourselves; situations that progressively weaken the strength of those unacceptable reactions and desires.

The second benefit:
We learn techniques and strategies for gaining better control over the reactions of our bodies and the positive side effect will be a sharpening of sensory perception and improved sense of well-being as a result of hormones released into the bloodstream while the exercises are performed. We substitute the alternative satisfaction of sensual but non-sexual experiences as compensation for the fact that we no longer indulge in unacceptable sexual practices. Sensual experiences are those experiences we sense with our eyes, ears, fingers and skin that lift our mood and energise us without producing sexual excitement.

The third benefit:
Within a year or 2 we find that the way our body reacts to sexual situations has changed so that those previously preferred but unacceptable sexual experiences are no longer more attractive than any others. That makes it easier for us to refrain from engaging in the old unacceptable sexual practices, by doing something different but equally satisfying and acceptable. Eventually the old unacceptable experiences become even less satisfying in comparison to the new.

The fourth but long term benefit:
This is one that you can anticipate now but will only experience at a much later stage in the program; that is the freedom after successful completion of the program to engage in healthy non-sexual and non-abusive intimate or affectionate acts with the people or children that we previously sought out for offensive sexual interactions. This helps motivate us now as we start out and it works as follows: Part of our motivation for engaging in sexual behaviour arises from our emotional make-up. In particular, we would have had legitimate needs for affection during childhood and adolescence that might not have been fulfilled. That situation leaves us with unconscious wishes for physically intimate or affectionate acts with certain people or children that ultimately end in sexual arousal or inappropriate touching. These unconscious wishes from years gone by still play out in our sexual behaviour in later years. By practising these exercises and reconditioning our sexuality we will eventually be freed of the sexual dimension inherent in those unacceptable wishes. Once that happens we will be able to engage in healthy non-sexual and non-abusive intimate or affectionate acts with the people or children that we previously sought out for sexual interactions. However before attempting something like that we first need to become truly safe with children or whatever the sexual situation it is that we want to change and make non-sexual. That may take several years. Once we have become safe, controlled and relaxed in those situations, we will then be able to have interactions that fulfil those emotional needs - not sexually or abusively, but nevertheless emotionally, which is equally satisfying and certainly better for all involved. So we can feel really good about ourselves in the end. That’s something worth working towards.

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What are the costs involved?

The costs are comparatively small and well worth it. All it requires is a consistent effort to practise the exercise strategies regularly until they become part of your lifestyle, while you make every effort not to engage in the old unacceptable sexual practices. Your resolve will be made easier to stick to if you continue to practise the exercise strategies. Like learning to play a musical instrument or a new sport – we practise until it becomes second nature to us. Then we find ourselves doing it almost effortlessly. Each strategy is provided at a cost of US$ 75. Subsequent consultations by email or telephone are free if under 15 minutes duration, or if more than 15 minutes duration, charged at US$ 75 per hour or part thereof.

Some people will need to go through three different stages to permanently and satisfactorily modify their sexuality. You can purchase all three strategies at once or one at a time as you progress through the 3 stages. Each strategy is provided at a cost of US$75 or US$185 if you need all three. If your aim is to achieve a celibate and chaste lifestyle by simply reducing all sexual feelings and activity, then only one program is required at a cost of US$75.

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How do I pay for a personalized strategy?

In order to compile a personal exercise strategy, some information is required. This is submitted anonymously and confidentially. After you submit your answers to the questionnaire (link) a provisional exercise program and instructions will be sent by return email. Key information is removed from the document so that it is only partly readable, but enough for you to review and form an idea of what you will receive if you choose to purchase the program. The program will only make complete sense once the full version has been supplied with all the missing information added. This will only happen once payment is received. Payment should be made into the account of the Internet Clinic from any local bank with a facility for making international wire transactions into foreign accounts (the bank account for the Internet Clinic is in New Zealand). If you wish to make an anonymous payment, specific details on how to do that will be sent to you after you have confirmed that you wish to purchase the program. You will also need to accept the disclaimer we send and the conditions of supply.

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What if I start the program and then give up half way?

If we give up the program half way we can’t expect much benefit. In fact, after giving up we will probably fall back into the old unacceptable habits we tried to escape from. If you don’t aim to see this through to the end, then it’s not worth starting yet. If you’re unsure, then first get your mind and heart ready. Talk to someone. Get someone to support your efforts.

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Where else can I find help?

These programs require long term application for best results. So, if you decide you really want to change but lack motivation, we advise that you engage the help of an experienced and trusted Christian Pastor, Priest, Rabbi, Secular Counsellor or Psychologist to help you especially in the beginning. They can help with the motivation and persistence needed to get you going with the program until it becomes part of your lifestyle. Then it’s a lot easier to complete. If you prefer to keep your sexuality private or you don’t have anyone nearby to help, you could contact one of the local anonymous telephone help lines such as Lifeline or an internet based support organisation such as Sexaholics Anonymous or the Sexual Recovery Institution. Don’t let anything deter your decision to stop sexual addiction.

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What other treatments are available for changing sexual feelings and behaviour?

Castration or certain drugs injected weekly will reduce or in some cases eliminate impulsive or offensive sexual behaviour, but those treatments are costly, drastic and can have serious side effects. In contrast, the strategies offered in these self-help programs have no negative side effects. They involve only natural activities and perceptual exercises.

In contrast to medical treatment, these self-help, home based programs have been developed so that progress is not as much dependent on and limited by the time spent in the psychologists office or treatment centre. So, success is not limited by costs for consultations and the availability of the psychologist but only by any lack of motivation on behalf of the client to continue practising the exercises.

One of the main factors that determine the outcome of any psychological program (including those for changing sexual feelings and behaviour) is the motivation of the person being treated. Unlike the effects of drugs or surgery, personality change only takes place to the extent that the person being treated accepts responsibility for his actions and feelings and puts into practice the strategies and exercises recommended by the psychologist to modify feelings and behaviour. The psychologist tries to help by nurturing and increasing the motivation of the client but many clients fail to take on their share of the responsibility. That’s when treatment fails.

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Liability and responsibility

It is important to note that unlike drugs or surgical treatment, that can be drastic and relatively fast acting, these self-help programs bring about a slow but steady process of change. Depending on age, significant change can take between 2 and 5 years with regular practice; younger men can usually change more rapidly.

In some cases the unwanted sexual feelings may seem to get stronger in the first few months of the program before getting weaker. So those who receive these programs must understand and accept that they remain responsible for their actions at all times and particularly their actions involving sexual behaviour with other people.

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Why sexual feelings and behaviour were previously difficult to change?

Those who have been in the habit of masturbating would typically have developed unconscious mental processes that trigger and reinforce the habit (the way obese people become more attuned to food and gratification as their stomachs and bodies get larger from over-eating). It's only by practising specific exercises and meditations to undo these unconscious associations (rather persistent once formed) that a person can permanently break free from the habit. Likewise the habit of offensive sexual behaviour requires the practice of specific exercises and meditations to undo the unconscious associations that perpetuate the habit. So we have to change the heart of the matter - the unconscious part of the brain where our emotions and passions are formed. A good conscience and sense of moral restraint in an individual with a low sex drive would prevent someone who masturbates with deviant sexual fantasies from acting them out with a victim. Likewise, an extremely strong moral conscience or fear of reproach is needed to restrain a highly sexed person with offensive desires. But some highly sexed people who are normally well controlled may offend when judgement is impaired by alcohol. Sheer will power with an unchanged heart will fail when a person is tempted while feeling spiritually low or when his judgement is impaired by alcohol. Some respected business men and wealthy socialites from Western countries would go on business trips or arranged tours to Asia or Africa where they sexually abused children in brothels and then went back to live "clean lives" at home in between the trips. This kind of behaviour happens when people believe they can get away with it without anyone finding out. But it will trouble your conscience until you do something about it.

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What information does the clinic need from me?

In order to compile a personal exercise strategy, some information regarding your sexual feelings and behaviour (but no names or identity details) is required. Please complete and submit this questionnaire intended to help you describe your individual feelings and the type of change you want to undergo.

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